How did I meet the one and only Brian Martin? Well, at Cafe Rio of course!

This is at least partially true.

It was a Thursday and I was in a momentary self proclaimed leadership position of the Anti Dating Club. I felt that every guy I went out with misunderstood me. It seemed they were so afraid of girls’ over zealous obsession with commitment, that doing something nice for them was a red flag for being marriage hungry. Bring over a plate of cookies…expect an engagement ring. I wasn’t in the mood for guys but then while waiting in line for my favorite meal, I see someone.

I noticed Brian (the unnamed, amazingly handsome guy, enjoying his burrito) sitting at the table with someone I had “dated”. It was more of a-hang out for a number of weeks and then fizzled into nothingness. The boy I had dated was sitting with his back toward me, Brian facing my direction, which made for easy staring position. Old guy couldn’t see me, Brian didn’t know me.

Who was this guy? I had met a number of Jesse’s friends (that was the old guys name-Jesse. Not old in age, old in…not longer the “new guy”) and this was one friend I definitely didn’t meet. I would have remembered Brian, he had a different look. He wore unique, thick framed glasses atop cheek bones that were dreamy. I would have remembered him. That I knew for sure.

What I didn’t know was that Jesse (who didn’t have roommates when he and I hung out) had gotten roommates. One of which was Brain. This was somewhat of a pickle…you don’t want to be the girl that bounces from roommate to roommate.

A few days had past and it was Sunday morning. I had a late Saturday night and woke up too late to make to my regular church meetings. This was typical college life for you. My brother Jesse (obviously a different Jesse) was living at home and invited me to come hear him sing. One of his friends was in charge of the Christmas program at her ward. Ward is a term used in the LDS church which describes a congregation which is typically sectioned according to geography. My brother and a couple friends had amazing harmonies and amazing looks so they often would go sing in different wards and church firesides. They were a crowd favorite.

I was happy to do this as I wanted to attend church. The ward was a student ward so the attendees were from 18-30 year olds. This ward was the Belmont ward and as far as I knew, Belmont guys thought they were all that and a bag of chips, so I wasn’t too impressed by them  I tagged along. They nailed it per usual. After the meeting people were gathered around, killing time until the second hour classes began. Jesse (brother) is super social and a lot of his friends were there. He was in no hurry to leave and I didn’t have a car.

Then, out of nowhere, across the room is the guy with the glasses. He was looking at me. I was looking at him. Then we were walking towards each other. You have to understand, it’s completely as cheesy as it sounds. 😀 We walked toward each other and started talking about who knows what. I knew EXACTLY who he was. He knew nothing of me. Why did he come talk to me anyway? The reputation of Belmont boys was that a girl could hold their interest for about five seconds until the next hottest girl walked into the room. Brian looked right at me. He didn’t look over my shoulder. He was talking TO me.

He told me about his going home to Missouri for Christmas break and his leaving on Tuesday. My mind quickly made imaginary plans for later that night, and lunch the next day to take advantage of his time remaining in Utah…but there was no such invite.

We talked for a minute longer and then he went off to class. I didn’t tell him I had seen him at Cafe Rio. I didn’t tell him we had a mutual friend. I didn’t tell him my number. Not sure I told him much of anything. Then he was gone.

Christmas break came and went and his face would pop up in my mind from time to time.

I had since discovered that Jesse (old fling) had moved on to one of my friends. My best friend/cousin Brittney. Usually the rule of “we don’t date the same guys” would have seemed relevant but this was actually perfect! I told Britt my plan. “You tell Jesse that you want to do a double date. Tell him to bring a roommate. Don’t say it’s me. Also, tell him to bring a tall friend.” We didn’t end up needing this plan and probably a good thing.

First day back at school I was waking down the Hall of Flags with one of my major big crushes Bryan. When we run into Brian. (Yup, another double name) I COULD NOT REMEMBER BRIAN’S NAME!!! How is this possible??? I had thought about this guy off and on for a couple weeks, I made hypothetical plans to score a date with him, and here he is, staring into me again and I can’t recall him name. I died. I got confused within their introduction and couldn’t quite tell if Brian (my Brian) was repeating Bryan’s name to ensure he understood it, or giving his own name-and I wasn’t willing to call him by my crushes name, unless they in fact shared the same name.

Bryan (crush) left Brain (my Brian) and me to ourselves and we talked about our new class schedules, Christmas break and his return to Utah. The whole time I’m scrambling for his name. He was so different than the other guys.

I pretended I was going to buy a psychology book from him “to save some money” as we had learned I was taking a class he had just finished. It was strictly business that I was asking for him number. I handed him my cell and told him to enter the info in, he saw right through me that I didn’t remember his name. He entered-name and number and hit save. Before heading off I said, “Hey! If you’re not doing anything tomorrow night, come to the basketball game. I’ll be dancing, it’ll be fun!”.

He didn’t come. Brian was no where in sight. You know when you’re secretly scanning the crowd, your eyes fleeting side to side looking for that face…nope. I can’t say I was surprised, it was a long shot anyway, Then there was a call at 11pm. Hearing Brian’s voice on the other end of the line was enough to make me jump up and down. Remember how I was on an anti dating kick? I guess that was over. After a minute or two I say “So do you want us to come over?” He replies, “Sure.” “Sure? or YEAH! because I don’t want to come over for a ‘sure'”. I counter. “YEAH!!” He tells me with more enthusiasm to make me believe him.

And within 15 minutes, I was knocking on his door.

He and his roommate Paul were watching Pearl Harbor. They were about 30 minutes in, right at the scene where the cork hit Ben Affleck in the nose. We laughed and laughed, rewound it and laughed some more. There was such a comfort next to Brian. I sat budded right next to him. I didn’t look dolled up. In fact, I was wearing the UVSC dance team track suit and my hair was a messy remnant of a slicked bun. I also had bits performance makeup lurking on my face…non of this mattered though. I had pledged that Brain was gong to know me. He was going to see the real me and I was no longer going to try and be what I thought a guy wanted in a girl. Authenticity was my motto.

Belmont was known for limited parking spaces and a patrol of tow trucks ready to boot and lift your car away. We didn’t dare park in the danger zone so we had a bit of a walk to our car. It as me, my friends Sarah and Brianna. Brian and Paul drove us to our car to save us the hike. As we drove they played a song “On my mind”, from a new upcoming artist, Kalai. I could hear Brian singing along. I don’t know why but I said to myself, “I could love this boy.”

These are details I don’t want to forget. These are the small things that added up to the most important choice of my life-who I was going to marry, who I was going to build a life with, to trust with my ALL.

That’s part one of the making of Mrs. Martin



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